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Why the wait and see approach is a horrible idea

1/2/2022

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I am writing this as a mom and not as the business owner here. Because the truth is, I don't care who you go to see. It doesn't have to be that you're one of our clients. You could live halfway around the world and the advice is the same. Sometimes when you call and you are looking for help it's easy to say "they just want our business" so it's easy to say "let's wait and see" when it comes to your kids talking, or walking, or whatever it is you're waiting on. 

This is the plea of a mom who has the knowledge and the skills and still ended up in a situation where I was saying, "Thank god I didn't wait and see." 

My little Luke had no words at the expected 15 month mark. Okay, no pressure here, boys are later than girls. I jumped into speech anyway because it can't hurt, right? Then 18 months came and went and still no words. We had a ghost word here or there that would come and then we never heard it again. Now I called Early Intervention to do an assessment because surely by now I would have heard words? Being a speech pathologist I was overly watchful for those words. 

My son qualified for Speech, OT and Special Ed. He wasn't pointing or waving. Clapping had come and then we lost it somehow. I had it on video though so I know it happened. It was very upsetting to hear the reports come in with low low scores across the board. My child? low scores? How could that happen? We read, I gave him organic food, no sugar, breastfed... I go through the list, did I miss something? Did I not give him enough attention? Was I being a bad teacher? The thoughts race through your head. None of them are true.

As a therapist myself, I developed a whole new level of awareness in how I speak to parents. This was eye opening for me. I was given the advice to hold objects up near my mouth more. Now, I have to say I was insulted. I was a professional in the field, which they new, and gave me such basic advice. Is it good advice, sure, but for me it was a kick in the stomach. Was I being a bad SLP for my own kid? It's the equivalent of being a nurse or a doctor and you get the advice of, make sure you wash your hands to clean off the germs. 

I was on a mission to get him help and if low scores were my way to help, then I was going to accept it. 

We began therapy... 

19 months,,,we heard "Hi dada!" Amazing!!! Thank you therapy! He was making leaps and bounds in every other area. Pointing came fast (even though it wasn't a totally isolated finger like the other kids...) and waving goodbye was here to stay. 

20 months.."Hi dada" had disappeared. Extremely frustrated. And so was my son. He was problem solving and figuring things out visually though. He was communicating nonverbally like crazy! Pulling and pushing us everywhere. But still no words!

21 months,.. 22 months.... "Go!" Another word. Please stay please stay!! Why are your words disappearing? No other skills regress I had never seen this in any child I had worked with. 

Then my own SLP who works for me took a look at him. She finally told me about 3 sessions in... "I think he has Apraxia" It just all came crashing down on me. This made sense. He fit every sign and symptom. 

Many kids are not diagnosed with Apraxia until about 3 when they have more words. In fact, it's not recommended to diagnose this so young. 

The thing is, if you have Apraxia, you need to be taught to speak a totally different way than the way we had been attempting. You need specialized and intensive treatment. The sooner we switch into the correct type of therapy, the sooner he speaks. 

My son has a motor speech disorder called Apraxia. It is rare to have true Apraxia, but it is of course possible. It is something he was born with. 

If you wait and see, the months of therapy he would have missed would have really set him back much further than he already is. Every month, kids gain skills rapidly. When there is a gap, that gap grows larger very fast. Right now, my son should be starting to put 2 words together and have about 50 words expressively. We have about 2 words. On a good day.

Wait and see is only good if there's no issue. Why would you wait and see? Why let the gap grow wider? In a month and a half he went from 6 month delay in skills to 4 month in everything but speech. Therapy works like magic. You can't see the change overnight but all of a sudden you take them out to a party and everyone notices a huge change in your child. And you think back to therapy and you go, but they just played? How did they do that?

It's the magic of therapy. 

We don't miss a session. We don't cancel. We don't wait.

We jump in, feet first, with as much therapy as we can. 

We are literally changing the way a child's brain works. That takes time, that takes frequency.... and every session, every day, brings us one step closer. 

Please don't wait, and please don't cancel your therapy sessions. 

Make the therapy happen. Even on days when I'm like - no way will he go for therapy today he is cranky and tired - We do it anyway. We work through challenges. It builds his character and helps him overcome problems. We make the therapy happen. 

Start the magic. 
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His first word made no sound

5/16/2021

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My baby is 14 months old now! I have been so overjoyed at his learning to walk, but I even more have been eagerly awaiting the arrival of his first words! Since he was born, this was the moment I was waiting for. I heard sporadic things that sounded like they could be words here and there. The ever popular dada, a hi, a grunting mmmmmm for more? But I couldn't get him to replicate it to tie it as a request or a label.  Finally, about 3 days before mothers day, I realized that my son was talking to me - and I almost missed it completely! 
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He was signing for milk every time I lifted up my shirt to feed him! This isn't a sign I regularly modeled, so I was surprised. 
Does it count as a first word - ABSOLUTELY! 
A word is a mutually agreed upon set of motor movements that communicate intent, protest, a comment, or label. 
My son was telling me he wanted milk! 

Courtesy of babysignlanguage.com Click the photo for more information!
I am writing about this not as a brag, but as a learning moment. I almost forgot the importance of signing. I was so focused on getting him to use his voice that I forgot he had one in his hands. If I wasn't paying attention, I might have missed this completely.  Who knows what we are missing when we hyper focus on one aspect of our child's life. They show us what they know in many ways - even if it's not the way you were expecting! 

Just keep watching out for those little communication attempts so you can reinforce to them that you hear them and you understand them! 
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the best place for baby to eat

1/7/2021

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So a friend of mine was getting ready to feed their baby for the first time and asked for some advice on things she should know before beginning this new adventure. One of the first things I mentioned was almost equally as important as what foods to eat- WHERE to put baby. 

The answer is usually, duh, in the high chair of course. This is a somewhat obvious fact, but what is not so obvious is what kind of chair is best, and there is a best.  No, i'm not here to push a specific brand, but the TYPE of chair that is best.  

signs of readiness

Even though some pediatricians say you can start solids at 4 months (cereal and oatmeal), I wouldn't recommend it from an anatomical perspective and a feeding therapist perspective.  Nutritionally, those foods are not really doing anything special for your baby. They are mostly empty calories. Cereal is void completely and can potentially lead to arsenic toxins exposure if rice is the basis of the cereal, where as oatmeal potentially has merits, but also concerns. Mainly if it is not organic, there is risk of toxin exposure.

There is a theory floating around in Facebook forums, that I had believed myself, that if you give the baby food before 6 months, specifically gluten, that it would lead to GI health issues due to gut permeability. What that means is that food can escape from your infants gut and get into the body. This can occur when the gut is not fully intact due to infancy and development, or it can occur due to environmental toxins.

When I looked at the research though, it argued that infants closed their guts by 1 month. A significant difference. So even if you started before 6 months with food, the gut should be closed. Unless of course there is a lot of toxin exposure from GMOs that can lead to gut permeability. 
The chair should have support beneath the child's feet.

Why is this relevant to feeding?

Why? Because the 90 degree position allows the head align over the shoulders and the trunk to be supported.

This is needed to keep an upright position.

When you are upright, the airway is open and food will be directed into the esophagus rather than the trachea (airway).

Additionally, being in this position also allows for movement, specifically, the ability to lean forward. When you can lean forward, you can pick up food more easily, lean in for more, or turn away in protest when finished. 


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  • Hips at a 90 degree angle
  • Knees at a 90 degree angle
  • Ankles at 90 degree angle
  • Knees over the edge of the seat
  • Tray between belly and breastbone

90, 90, 90

Some benefits of the 90 degree angle are:
  • Decreased risk of choking 
  • Improved ability to pick up and manipulate food
  • Ideal for breath support
Do you have a chair already? Check out this awesome post from New Ways Nutrition to learn more about how you can modify your specific chair!
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How to Get baby to respond to their name

10/14/2020

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Most babies have a natural reaction to sounds. By 6 months, you should have observed by now if your baby does not respond to loud or abrasive sounds. You need to get your baby's hearing tested if they did not get their infant hearing test completed at birth or if you suspect a hearing difficulty. If your child has had any ear infections, you should make sure the infection has completely cleared up. Recurring ear infections are a cause of infant language delay. 

step 1: Respond to sound (within their line of sight)

If baby's hearing is normal, then we need to teach baby that they should be responding to sounds. We achieve this by operant conditioning. You may recall the name from a psychology class. Operant conditioning is training someone to do something by reinforcing the correct behaviors. So we will be reinforcing the behavior (turning towards the sound) and reinforcing that with something desirable for baby (tickles, a toy, etc.)
  1. Sit directly in front of your child where they see you. 
  2. Make sure your child is awake and alert when you try this, but engaged with another toy or object. 
  3. In your hand, have an object you will use as a reinforcement if you choose to reinforce with a preferred toy. 
  4. Start making noise.  I like to use a noisy object as a reinforcer as well. You can do this by clapping, banging, shaking a rattle, etc. 
  5. Keep doing this until your child looks over at you. 
  6. When he does, immediately reward them by handing them the reinforcer.  You will know best what your child is likely to enjoy most.  If your child responds to smiles, hugs, tickles, or a favorite toy. Avoid food as a reinforcer. 
    1. If your child is still not looking at you, you can move yourself closer so you are practically in their face so that they accidently look at you.   
    2. Wait a moment or two and move to a slightly different position that is still in your baby’s line of sight.  
    3. Then, start making all the commotion again. 
    4. Once again, reward your baby for looking at you.

STEP 2: RESPOND TO SOUND (out of LINE OF SIGHT)

Now that your child is able to respond when you make a loud sound in his line of vision, we want him to start responding when he can’t immediately see the source of the noise.
  1. You can start this activity at the edge of your child’s line of vision. 
  2. Start in a position where he can probably just barely see you out of the corner of his eye. 
  3. Make your noise and commotion and call his name just like you did in the last step. 
  4. If he looks over, reward him just like the last step. 
  5. If not, keep moving yourself farther into his line of vision until he does look at you and then reward him. 
  6. Each time you do this and he is successful at looking at you, move slightly farther out of his line of vision. 
  7. Once you are completely out of his line of vision, you will want to reward him when he turns his head to look for you.  For example, if you are standing behind your baby and slightly to the right when you make your sound and he turns his head toward the right, immediately come around to the front of him again and reward him for turning.  You can say things like “there’s Mommy!” and “you found Mommy!” to reinforce him as well.  Keep using the tangible rewards though if he needs them (like a toy, milk, or food).
  8. Make sure to practice this on both sides of your baby so he’s not always turning toward the same side to find you.

STEP 3: RESPOND TO name

Now that your child will respond when you make a big noise and commotion, we want your child to respond just as well to your voice.
  1. Start off back in front of your child where he can see you. 
  2. Call your child’s name like you did before but this time don’t clap, bang, or make any other noise, just use your voice.  You can say things like “Look at Mommy”, “Where’s Mommy?”, “Oh _____(child’s name), where are you?”.  If your child looks at you, reward him just like in the other steps.  If not, move into his line of vision until he accidently looks at you and reward him again. 
  3. Keep doing this until he is consistently looking toward your voice. 
  4. Then, start moving farther and farther outside of his line of vision.  Keep rewarding any time he turns toward your voice.  You should also be rewarding him any time you see him turn toward your voice throughout the day.  You don’t have to be specifically working on it at the time.
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Working mom, is that the life I want?

10/9/2020

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The part about maternity leave I hated most was the part where it ended. I am a worker. That is just who I am. I work no matter what, much to my husband's dismay.  Leaving my baby was hard though. Going back to a job and coworkers I adore made it a little bit easier, but I know I'm not the only one who considered quitting their job to become a stay at home mom. 
Being a mom is a new type of job that requires your physical presence. I had a moral and ethical dilemma each and every morning. Go to work and leave my baby or stay home and shirk my responsibilities. Here were my pros and cons of going back to work... 

pros

  • Make money, to support your child so they have everything they need
  • You get to socialize with real adults
  • You get a break from the mom life

cons

  • You are literally working to pay someone else to watch your child. 
  • You miss socializing with your own baby
  • You miss special moments with your baby that you cannot get back

A lot of people would say... well really they sleep for like 3-4 hours a day so you're really only missing 2-3 hours of awake time. 
But here's the thing... When baby is sleeping is when:
  1. The laundry gets done
  2. The kitchen is cleaned
  3. You can cook food
  4. You clean the bathrooms
  5. You weed the garden
  6. You play with the dog

If you aren't home.... when does that stuff get done? Oh yeah, when you get home from work. But, wait? Isn't that the time you're supposed to be with your baby because you were working all day? 

Sigh....


And then moms get sad. They get overworked, cranky and tired. That's when we order take out. That's when we invest in a cleaning person (or just let the house get messy), that's when you hire a landscaper. And there goes some of the money you just made going back to work! 

Thanks a lot, America!

Which brings me to my next topic, hating America's maternity leave. I am a believer in investing time and energy in youth yield the best societal results long term. Why is it that America's elite who are running things can't get that through their thick skull? Now to be fair, the multi million dollar companies like Netflix and Google and Apple are pretty good about that I hear, but America's educational system? Probably the worst maternity leave. It's actually just "sick time" and sometimes, they even cap that! For example. My sick leave was 40 days (that I had to save for years to get) and even though I had 47, I couldn't use them all, I could only use 40. That is my employer's personal policy- not every teachers. 

Then my friend who works in the cosmetic industry get 6 months paid maternity leave. ummm WHAT? How does it make sense that people who work with kids get the worst maternity leave? Well it's because schools are funded by government and don't make money and companies are profitable and can afford to do things like pay for moms to stay home.

In order for anything to change, we need to shift as a society with leaders who insist upon fair treatment. Investing in moms is an investment in the future of the country. Other countries have already figured this out....

  • Hungary tops the list of best maternity leaves in the world. Maternity leave begins 3 weeks before baby is born and continues for about half the year, with an option for three years off at 70% salary for first 18 months.
  • Estonia moms get 85 weeks (about a year and a half) or maternity leave at full pay.
  • Iceland moms AND dads are given nine months total maternity leave at 80 percent of their salary. Each parent is required to take three months off from work.

​Let's see... required to take time with their kids, full pay, moms and dads... other countries seem to really have it figured out. A UNICEF 2019 report put America LAST on the list of countries with benefits for new parents. 

                     To get the full list of top 10 countries for paid family leave, click here


And then we have a society on the verge of a mental breakdown. They are overworked and they need to be with their families.  Kids need to be raised by parents, not babysitters! They need to sit around a table and talk to their parents and siblings. They shouldn't be eating junk food in the car in between running around. What happened to those good old days? 

Tell me your thoughts in the topic. It's something I'm passionate about and feel so strongly that we need to find a way to keep moms at home with their kids as much as humanly possible. 
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Baby Led Weaning: fantastic or frightening?

10/9/2020

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What is Baby Led Weaning ?

Baby-led weaning is a child directed limiting (or weaning) from mother's milk to a diet of table foods. This is not a new concept, and many cultures around the world have done this for centuries, but it is gaining traction in America as the hip thing that all the crunchy moms are doing. 

Why I wanted baby led weaning for my son

When a researching mom is researching food, she is bound to come across baby led weaning or (BLW as it's commonly referred to on a variety of social message boards). I will admit this is not a topic we went over in graduate school. I believe it was a short video clip and not much more information.  This was something I had to learn about on my own; just like any other mom. The research was there, the reviews were in: Baby led weaning had benefits such as:
  • Less likely to choke (what? how?!?)
  • Less likely to become a picky eater (oh hey now!)
  • Better oral motor skills
  • More independent eater at a much faster rate
  • Better appetite control later on
The moms who did baby-led weaning were adamant that it was an amazing experience, just a tad messy in the beginning (nothing I couldn't handle, right?) The moms who did baby-led weaning were enjoying dinner out a restaurants with their family while baby practically took care of themselves. This was something I could really get behind! 

How we started

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I read two great books about it. One was more informational and one was more cookbook-like with some info smattered here and there. I enjoyed both of them! I also watching a handful of videos about it. Watching kids eat steak and chicken legs before they had teeth was some kind of fairytale. I just had to try this! There are also some facebook groups that target this topic that are perhaps a better resource than the books! There were a bunch of rules that came along with this: 
  1. Baby has to be at least 6 months (generally)
  2. Baby has to be able to sit up on their own
  3. Baby needs to pick up objects and bring them to their mouth independently. 
  4. They need to show an interest in food
  5. The tongue thrust reflex (where they push things out of their mouth with their tongue) needs to be gone




Once the criteria are met, you have the green light to go! 

our first experience

I was putting a lot of pressure on this moment. I was expecting too much. He mostly just squished the avocado in his hands and got a few specs in his mouth. Here are some of the foods we started with:
  • Avocado
  • Banana
  • Sweet potato 


The peanut gallery

As you might expect from your own parents, mine thought I was crazy. Ugh, they were so old fashioned! Did they seriously think babies still ate baby food? So naive! After I sent a video of my son eating broccoli, I got an angry call form my father, "HE is going to CHOKE! I never want to see him eating food like that. He doesn't have any TEETH! It's just basic common sense!" Please dad, what do you know about feeding babies? I got this! I read the book, did you? In the back of my mind, the words common sense stuck in my head. It did seem like common sense that you needed teeth to chew food....

gagging, or choking?

There is a distinct different between gagging and choking:
GAGGING
  • Coughing
  • Spitting out food
  • ksjdfkjsd
CHOKING
  • Silent
  • No coughing 
  • jsdhfhsdfh
I feel like he was doing better with food at the beginning. At one point, it seemed he wasn't really gagging anymore.  He would spit out pieces that were too big. Perhaps we did too many spoon foods? I don't recall it being a rule that you couldn't do a lot of spoon foods? We did foods that were naturally puree like mashed potatoes, oatmeal, yogurt, and guacamole.

i'm failing

I felt like the more I tried, the more he was struggling. He was gagging more and I felt like sometimes he was skipping gagging completely. The pieces he was sucking into his mouth were just too big! I would gingerly place the food down. Then, as he brought it to his mouth,

                          I just held my breath ....

                                                 ...and waited.......

Now a rule about BLW is that you are not supposed to intervene unless the baby is showing visible signs that they cannot breathe, otherwise this could result in them choking. So then he would starting gagging and spit out some food, okay, fine! 

As a mom, a new mom, to literally sit there and try to 'wait out' a potential choking episode when your child is buckled into a chair is beyond anxiety provoking.     BEYOND!

There were 3- heart stopping times -that I felt I needed to intervene. Before I had him out of the chair, he had cleared it on his own (which is what the book told me would likely happen, by the way). HOWEVER, even with that being said, by the third time, I truly decided that this wasn't for me. I just couldn't handle it. I was a nervous wreck eating and I didn't want my fears and anxieties to be picked up by him. I wanted mealtimes to be enjoyable for everyone. 

finding a middle ground

I tried to keep as many elements from BLW as possible as we closed the book on that technique for this baby in this moment. Some things that I took from it that I think are important!
  1. Always let baby feed themselves
    1. I never put the spoon in his mouth, I hand him the spoon and he is in charge of getting it into his mouth. He leads the way in terms of indicating he is done (i.e. pushing food away, spitting it out, trying to get up), so there is no "trying to finish the bowl."  I completely respect his boundaries with food.  In a month and a half we had drastically improved in our accuracy and our ability to clean the spoon off! Proud mama!!
      1. As a side note to this, I also allow baby to touch the food on the tray so they experience it that way as well. 
  2. Baby should eat what you're eating
    1. ​I like to cook and I do it often and am comfortable mixing spices and flavors and trying out new recipes. I realize not everyone is, but in general, I think the 'eat what you're eating' is a good idea because it exposes baby to way more flavors than they will ever get in a jar or a pouch. 
  3. Eat real food
    1. Not once in baby led weaning were puffs or teething crackers mentioned. I see these as highly processed foods that should be avoided. No matter how many vegetables they manage to shove in there. Stick with the real thing!

what we eat now...

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Now at 7 months, we have really been able to incorporate more finger foods. Bananas are no longer mashed with my fork, I pull off small pieces for him to pick up on his own.  

At 8 months and 9, we continue finger foods and some spoon fed foods as well. The pieces of food got a little bit bigger too to be more manageable for him to pick up. He amazes me what he is able to pick up with his little fingers! He strips a spoon like a pro! We are starting drinking from a cup and straw too!  


What I would do differently next time

I might start a little after 6 months. Even though he had all the signs of readiness, maybe he just wasn't ready. Another side of me thinks, he might have needed to go through the struggle to be the great eater he is now. 

If you tried BLW and feel like you failed, don't feel that way. You tried something that just didn't work well for you. It doesn't mean that it wouldn't work well with a different baby. It doesn't mean you did something wrong. Baby just wasn't into it and they will do better later.

​Focus on making mealtimes about family and enjoying good food!
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6 month milestones! Time to eat!

9/10/2020

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We are nearing the end of 6 months on earth now and it's time for me to reflect back on this past month. It was been a whirlwind for sure! SOO much development and excitement this month! ​Baby should be rolling all around by this point and is starting to get into mischief if you look away for seemingly one second! 
If you have waited to start foods, this is the month that you typically begin!

​More to come on that topic too!


Going back to work full time has been a hard adjustment. I had a lot to say about feeling related to going back to work plus my fears of not pumping enough, missing first moments, are all laid out in my post. Check it out here! 

Lots of exciting firsts to come during this month!

receptive language

  1. Baby is usually able to recognize their own name at this point. This is noticeable with a head turn in the direction of the name.
  2. Baby should be recognizing familiar people and turning their head in the direction of new sounds. 

​

expressive language

  1. Reduplicated babbling is just beginning! What is this? It's the official term for "baby-talk" (mama, dada, baba). This is due to the vocal tract maturing. They now have control of their ability to open and close the vocal tract ' on command' in the way we use it to make consonant and vowel combination sounds (CV) (like da). It will be awhile before baby is able to make CVC ( consonant vowel consonant ) sounds (like mom). 
  2. How can I encourage this?
    1. ​Imitate baby when they do it! baby's are natural imitators and will watch your mouth closely. 
    2. You can help move their mouth up and down too! Just don't make it the main part of your routine, but every once and awhile, some tactile input to teach them what their mouth should be doing is helpful in my opinion. It's just like doing hand over hand! 

social

Baby already recognizes their caregiver, but now they start to recognize routines. For example, if playtime is in a certain spot, they might get excited as you get nearer to the door. 
  1. Starting to understand the tone of voice associated with negative emotions, like when you say "no!" baby can tell a shift in tone and may respond.
  2. Baby may interact with their image in a mirror .
  3. Certain social situations will visibly make baby happy or upset. 
  4. Baby should smile when spoken to and make eye contact frequently.
  5. Baby should react to loud sounds as well as their name by turning towards the sound. As long as you know baby's hearing is intact, this should be automatic.
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​If baby is not responding to sounds or making eye contact, you can try the following:
        1. Ensure baby is engaged with something else or looking in the other direction before you begin.
        2. Make sure you have something reinforcing to baby (a favorite toy, teething pop, etc.
        3. Hold the toy up by your face.
        4. Make a sound using a toy directly in line with baby's sight.
        5. When baby turns to look, reinforce verbally and by giving them the toy.
        6. Once baby is consistently looking, and make sure the toy is in line with your eye level, only release the toy when eye contact is achieved. At this point, they should know the 'game' and expect the toy to be released. 

oral motor 

It's time to eat! Check out my companion post on baby led weaning! 
Here is what you should be seeing to make sure your mealtimes are successful!
  1. ​​Sitting without support
    1. You may say, wait, how is that related to oral motor abilities? In order to have good oral motor skills, you need truck support. This is why feeding chair selection is important. We choose the Stokke Tripp Trapp.
  2. Open mouth in response to a spoon
    1. This is evident from 4 months on, but if you are starting solids at 6 months, now is when you will see this.
  3. Gag reflex
    1. Babies are gaggers naturally to protect their airway from objects that are a choking hazard. This should decline as baby gets to be a better eater.
  4. Tongue thrust is gone.
    1. They should not be protruding tongue during the mealtime and pushing the food out of the mouth.
  5. Up and down munching
    1. If you are doing baby led weaning, you will see infants trying to gum the food where their molars would normally be.
  6. Picking up food
    1. This is hard unless the food is appropriate sized. Think the size of a finger. This is of course only if you are doing baby-led weaning.
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I kept it to food we were eating for the most part. I always made sure my food had a lot of different spices and flavors. Babies are exposed to flavors in utero as well as through breastmilk, but you want to continue to reinforce acceptance of different flavors early on. Some of the foods we tried this month were:
  • Yogurt
  • Sweet Potato
  • Avocado
  • Banana
  • Bread (which I somewhat regret doing)

Why not breaD?

So what happened was we went out to eat and someone said, "Hey, can he try some bread?" And I thought sure, why not!? He did great with bread, loved it! It was easy for him to mouth and disintegrated nicely into mush. 

What I thought of afterwards though was that the bread was not organic, so the wheat was GMO wheat. Wheat alone with gluten can be difficult to digest. A lot of people have allergies to gluten that develop.  I personally think I have an intolerance.  That plus the GMO on top of it which can cause leaky gut in a little baby whose gut isn't fully developed made my stomach go into knots. One bread encounter wasn't going to kill him though, so I tried not to stress over it! We haven't done it since. I want to wait until his gut is a little bit more developed, but it will have to be fresh, organic bread! 
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5 month Milestones! What to Expect!

7/20/2020

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I feel like 5 months is quite the milestone! I cannot believe our baby has been in the world for 5 months! A lot of things have happened. A lot has changed. Life is different now. But not always in a bad way! We are mostly out of that 4 month regression at this point, although sleep has never fully recovered. 

In some ways, baby is much more like a person this month! It sounds like they want to talk to you, there's the beginning of laughing, they are interested in what you have in your hands and how your mouth is moving. It's like you can see their wheels turning in their brain! 
Picture

language

What should you notice about babies' language:
  1. ​Baby should be looking in the direction of sounds
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​Get toys that make sounds and hold the toys adjacent to baby so they have to turn their body to find the source​
  2. Expressively, you should hear baby making lots of noise! Cooing and babbling
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​Repeat back sounds that you hear baby saying! This reinforces their speech production.  You should be hearing things like 'ba' and 'da'.
  3. You may hear sounds /p/ /b/ and /m/, but not in reference to anything in particular. Baby is making lots of vocal play sounds
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​​Repeat back the sounds they are saying. You can also begin targeting labels of words or objects that contain those sounds (i.e. book, up, mama, moo, papa) 
  4. Giggling and laughing should continue to gain speed. You will find the silliest things or phrases can make baby giggle! 
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​​Repeat the action or phrase that made them laugh! Be dramatic and exaggerated in your intonation and your movements! For example, don't just tickle, take a deep gasping inhale and build up by lighting your arms high above their head before you drop down and say 'tickle tickle tickle tickle!!' They should start to anticipate what is to come! 
  5. Baby should start responding to the sound of their name!
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. Be sure to call baby by name in isolation (not in a string of a words in a sentence). When baby looks at you in response, have something fun ready for them or make a silly face to get baby to laugh! They are making the connection now that they should be looking when someone calls their name. This should continue to grow into a stronger skill into month 6!​

social

  1. You may notice baby responding to your facial expressions and tone of voice. If you are frustrated, baby seems to respond negatively or becomes upset. 
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​You can practice making a stoic face without apathy. Watch babies reaction! Between 5-6 months, you should begin to see them almost imitate you. Now change it and give baby a big smile! They should react accordingly and begin to smile!
  2. Baby should start communicating their needs in subtle ways, like reaching up with their hands when they want you to pick them up!
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​​When you notice their gestures during repeated daily activities, honor their request! This is the beginning of how we learn to express language. It is all reinforcement. If you want to go up and you raise your hands for mom to pick you up and it happens, what do you think the likelihood is that you will try that again? What if it is ignored? You may try once or twice, but after that you can see it isn't working so they make stop that gesture. If baby is not giving you cues, try doing hand over hand (physically take their hands and have them reach up towards you while saying 'up' and then pick them up right away so they begin to make the connection!
  3. Baby should start recognizing familiar people
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​Get excited when someone comes into view that they know! "Look! It's grandma! She's here!!"

Play

Playing is still new to baby at this point, but they are starting to engage with toys more and more!
  1. ​Baby should recognize frequently used toys or objects
  2. How can I encourage this?
    1. ​Start familiar play routines with toys! Use familiar language with toys as well! I give examples below on how I use this sound puzzle to play with babies (slightly older babies), but you can use those same words starting right now!

literacy

If you are reading to your baby daily, and I cannot recommend enough that you do so, they should start taking an interest in participating with you! 
  1. Baby may show an interest in wanting to hold the book or turn the pages
    1. Baby should start reaching for books and showing an interest in holding and manipulating the,
    2. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​​Allow them to participate! I recommend you use board books exclusively, otherwise you will surely have ripped pages. You can use hand over hand to help them learn how to turn the page. You may need to start the turn and also have to release their hand from the page before you can read. ​

Cognitive

Your babies brain is developing rapidly this month!! They are understanding things on a more sophisticated level for the first time. 
  1. Object Permanence: Now that baby is learning that an object is underneath something- it didn't just completely vanish- they are able to 'find' objects.
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​Hide objects under a blanket, but leave it partially covered and within reach.
      2. Play peek-a-boo!
  2. Babies are starting to imitate you in subtle ways!
    1. How can I encourage this?
      1. ​Be a great model! 
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when you just can't listen to the wheels on the bus anymore...Here are 5 other options for baby music!

7/14/2020

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If you are "all done" with the Wheels On The Bus song, you're not alone! I have been slowly finding some fantastic things out there for baby to listen to! At 4-5 months old, baby gets 'bored' and is expecting some entertainment. Music has been essential to keeping peace and calm. He thoroughly enjoys listening to such a variety of music and its fun to see him anticipate some parts of songs. Here are some of our favorites!!

cocomelon

If you looked at previous posts I mention the CocoMelon YouTube Channel, which I am still a big fan of! I like the variety of songs and that they provide LYRICS! Why don't more people do that?! I can't remember the words to EVERY song! The animals and animations are cute and I love the stories they set to music! Like the three little pigs story/song! They also teach manners with the please and thank you song (and they use sign language in this video too! Double win!). 

lori berkner

Lori Berkner is a daily occurrence in our house! I find myself singing her songs when I am alone in my car and in the shower. Beware, they are super catchy. Best of all, my screaming child quiets instantly when he hears the intro to any of her songs. They are just engaging and usually there's an educational piece. She sings and plays guitar; it just works! 

barney

Good old Barney! I forgot my long time love of this weird purple dinosaur. I was a big Barney fan, so why would I expect any less from my own child!? He LOVES the songs! Right now he's too small to understand the episodes and it just isn't getting his attention, but the song compilation is PERFECT! He quiets down whenever I turn it on.

raffi

Along the same lines of Lori Berkner, but classic. I really just love the Baby Beluga song, but it's just so classic I had to throw it in! He also does the classic 'Down By The Bay' song. (Cocomelon's is better but shhh). Not as animated as I would hope, but still a good option. 

fantasia

So about a million years ago, Disney made a weird, somewhat random movie called Fantasia. You can find it on Disney+ if you have it. There's a newer version Fantasia 2000, but it's just not the same. If you are unfamiliar, it's classical music set to colors and pictures. Sometimes there is a storyline (i.e. Micky's infamous sorcerer's hat comes from this movie). My son absolutely loves this and it has gotten us out of quite a few jams (when screaming was more fun than anything else). It's not educational per se, BUT the music is complex and it's mostly colors and pictures set to classical music. It's an almost daily occurrence. 
Tell me about your favorite musical shows to watch with baby in the comments! 
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How sign language encourages speech development

7/6/2020

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I feel like some parents have a stigma about sign language. I had a parent tell me once, "I don't want you to work on signing, I want him to talk!" There are sometimes myths that float around that signing might result in late talking, or may prevent them from talking sooner. This is not true! It is actually the opposite!

There's a few reasons why......
  1. If you think about communication, humans as a species will always communicate in the easiest way possible that is effective. What do I mean by that? Think about how you communicate! People shorten words, text instead of call, text with abbreviations! You do what is easiest!  Same for babies! When they have no words, but they can move their hands, then that is what's easiest for them at the moment. Research supports use of sign language for babies as well as debunks any myths that it would delay language. In fact, it is the opposite! It builds language and supports vocabulary development while reducing frustration level (for both parent and baby!)
  2. Signing is also a form of communication. We use it everyday. We point to things, we gesture, throw our hands in the air. We communicate with our hands more than you think! 
​

how to choose what signs to start with:

You really just need to figure out two things.....
  1. What do you want baby to communicate? Is it important they say your name? Are manners the most important? This will be an individual thing for each family, but most people want baby's basic needs communicated (hungry, tired, bathroom)
  2. What can you incorporate easily into your routine? Signing will only take off if you model and use it! If you realllyyyy want the to learn the sign for airplane but you don't talk about airplanes all day then it isn't happening. 

our first signs

These have been my go to signs starting out:
  • Mom
  • Dad
  • Bathroom (Toilet)
  • Music
  • Sleep
  • Eat
While these signs worked for my family, you may choose different signs to begin with. There is not a set progression at all!

​What will be most effective is something you can remember to do often! 

when can you expect to see baby signing?

Babies that have been signed to since birth or soon after can sometimes begin to sign around 8 months old.

​Now you may say... that's annoying they start talking at 12 months, why put in all that effort? 
For a couple reasons!
  1. Your baby may not start talking at 12 months! I know it's what the books say, but not every child is right on cue. Kids develop at their own pace. Some it may be more like 15 months. Also, some children can have some delays that prevent them from talking. There are also other disorders that are associated with expressive language you may not know or realize the child has until later on (such as apraxia, or autism). Having signs as a way to communicate decreases the frustration associated with these disorders. 
  2. It builds vocabulary! You are teaching labels for people, actions, and objects. Knowing that what they want has a name is important!
  3. It teaches communicative intent! When we learn to communicate with words, we learn that words hold power. Power to get me that thing that I want. Learning that their communication has a purpose builds motivation and this is how you get that ball rolling with words. 

what NOT TO DO WITH SIGN LANGUAGE 

DON'T make signing an absolute requirement-- If you are waiting for baby to sign to move onto your next activity, it will end in tears for everyone
DON'T make signing an unnatural part of your communication-- No one says music 12x in a row. 
DON'T make them communicate the same thing twice-- if they can say the word already, they don't need to sign it too before you accept it as a response. It's a little unusual to see this go the opposite way where a child that can say the word will sign it instead. Like I said before, we do what's easiest and talking is easier than signing because you don't need your communication partner to be looking directly at you to communicate with them. 

what to DO WITH SIGN LANGUAGE 

DO make sure you sign across a variety of settings and with a variety of people--signing for mom shouldn't only be when we wake up! It should be when you leave, arrive, in the mirror, etc.
DO help baby make the signs with hand over hand!-- This helps them learn the motor plan they need to execute to make that sign happen!
DO accept approximate signs at first! -- They won't do it perfect the first time! If it's in context and you know what they meant, show them you get it by verbalizing what they are communicating (i.e. 'you want milk!? Great job telling mommy!! Here is your milk!') 
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