my breastfeeding journey part 3

It's been 4.5 months since I started my breastfeeding journey and I'm happy to report that at about the 3 month mark, I felt really good about my decision to continue breastfeeding. It is sooooo much easier to just pop him on and feed him quick than to heat up a bottle. I have been told that this is what's called 'Breastfeeding Nirvana' and I do agree!

That being said, here are some new struggles that appeared EVEN AFTER I got a handle on breastfeeding... 

• Criticizing my milk output: I have been finding that I continue to doubt my abilities about whether or not he is fed enough. Aside from that, I'm realizing that I need to start producing more pumped milk because the clock is ticking on my maternity leave. I have less than 2 months until I go back full time and I dread that day so much. I feel like I can barely get enough milk into the bottle for getting out of the house for 2 hours every other day, let alone an entire day's worth of food for him!? and 5 days a week!??! Panic ensues! This is where a formula fed baby has it easy. No worries there! But there is NO SUBSTITUTE for the protection that breastmilk gives. So I solider on...  I bought a couple of milk boosting products before my lactation consultant told me to get something that DOES NOT CONTAIN Fenugreek (they all did of course). Apparently it can make babies gassy, and my baby was PLENTY gassy on his own. So I started using this one with good success. 
• Critical of how baby is latching: Is the latch still good? I feel in my heart that it is still not perfect. I see his little tongue cupping the nipple as he feeds and that is not normal. The latch is no longer painful. I need to make certain things a priority and perfecting his latch isn't high up on my list right now. I'm no longer in survival mode, but i'm still just trying to make it through each day. I know he is gaining weight and getting longer, so it's not so much a matter of is he able to grow and thrive, but is he comfortable...and he doesn't seem to be in distress.
• Baby is distracted: Is he even hungry? He is popping off to look around CONSTANTLY! I put that nursing cover to good use, but it is SO ANNOYING to use! Maybe it is the soft material mine is made of, but I feel like i'm always adjusting something with it on! 
• Milk Machine: My new priority is finding time to sit and pump milk. Do yourself a favor and invest in the portable breast pump! It wasn't covered by insurance, but I should have upgraded! I am now pumping whenever I can. It would seem that my baby knows when those times are and needs me at those EXACT moments. ...sigh... but I am pumping more and more. The more I pump, the more I produce. I haven't felt that 'engorged' feeling in a longgg time. I assume that is because my body is making what baby needs and not much more. I'm testing out a variety of natural supplements to see if that helps my supply. Sitting there for 25 minutes and getting 3 oz of milk is just not cutting it.
• "Oh crap! I Forgot to drink!": I find myself saying wayyy too often 'oh crap! I barely drank anything all day!!' To make milk, you need to drink lots of water and eat! This is what happens when you are running around trying to clean up in-between micro naps that baby is taking during their 4 month sleep regression. 
  • ​As a side note, I am extremely particular about the water I drink (shocking, I know). My friends laugh and make fun because on a trip we took I asked them to find me some "quality water" and I haven't lived it down yet. It is true though that what kind of water you drink is affecting the baby as well as your own health! Note the studies linking Fluroide in drinking water have been proven to reduce the IQ of children! I drink water basically exclusively out of my Berkey filter and pour it into some kind of glass or stainless steal container. I avoid drinking water out at restaurants. I will sometimes drink Pellegrino if they have it, but that's about it! 

 

I was told, and know it to be true for myself at least, that boys are so hungry when they wake and start crying immediately for food. Girls are okay waiting a bit. So far, that is the case for my little boy! I have about 30 seconds TOPS from when he wakes to getting food in him before the wailing begins!

This makes me SO glad that I stuck with breastfeeding! Having the freedom to feed him whenever/wherever is somewhat liberating! It's one less thing to worry about. It was worth the extra work & I would do it all again- hands down!!